Get all 9 Captain Martini and the Key Stoners releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Trampled, Space Tang, Try to Keep Up, Walmart On Fire, Giddy Up, Rock Star, Blizzard Of Us, Most People Suck, and 1 more.
1. |
Bummed
01:28
|
|||
Nothing's ever changed
And everything's the same
Cancer in remission
Now it's back to bother you
Life hasn't been great
And I deserve a little more
Than what I've had
Things have to get easier
They don't know me
None of them know me
They think they do
But I know that they don't
Must be more to life
Than what I've fucking had
I need to figure it out
Before it gets too bad
Miserable, miserable
Why is everything so fucking god damn depressing
|
||||
2. |
||||
Nothing but crap on the radio today
This is the song where we say Hey! Hey!
Those Berklee boys sure can play
But t his is the song where we say Hey! Hey!
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey...
|
||||
3. |
||||
I've been rocking
I've been rolling
I've been losing my mind
I've been strange
I've been deranged
I've been a little unkind
I've been cool
I've been to school
I've been lickidy split
Things change
Things rearrange
Things just turn to shit
And all the pretty girls
Are watching
I've been writing
I've been fighting
Baggage unpacked
The pain I feel
The joy I steal
The love that I lack
On this stage
All my rage
Being disclosed
Can't you see
The real me
Totally exposed
And all the pretty girls
Are watching
Don't look at me
Please look at me
I've been rocking
I've been rolling
I've been losing my mind
|
||||
4. |
Sucker
00:59
|
|||
I give in I break
I give in I break
I'm a sucker
Sucker Sucker Sucker
I break I break I break
|
||||
5. |
Peyote for Payola
01:38
|
|||
I'm a DJ
Give me a BJ
My favorite Ramone is
CJ
Peyote for payola
Everyday of the week
I'm a winner
I'm a sinner
Roll me a fatty
Don't want no pinner
Peyote for payola
Everyday of the week
|
||||
6. |
Ode to FP
00:12
|
|||
Crotch hopping
Crotch hopping
Town to town
|
||||
7. |
Dos Ringos
02:22
|
|||
I saw the bass and decided to play
Then the drums showed up one day
Me and Mark jamming every night
Bad ass rockers no end in sight
Dos Ringos
And we're having a blast
Dos Ringos
Stepping on the gas
Dos Ringos
We're kicking some ass
Dos Ringos
Dos Ringos
Don't you know I wrote this song for you
Don't you know you can do it too
Grab a guitar bass anything
And then you can start to sing like
Dos Ringos
And we're having a blast
Dos Ringos
Stepping on the gas
Dos Ringos
We're kicking some ass
Dos Ringos
Dos Ringos
Dos Ringos and we're kicking some ass
you know you love it
|
||||
8. |
Love is Bullshit
01:08
|
|||
Love is a bullshit thing
That makes you want to sing
Pathetic songs like this
Pass out in your beer
Wake up in your piss
Life it's a kick in the ass
And in the end at last
You get to die
That is all the reward you're going to get
So why cry about
Love it's a bullshit thing
and I don't want to sing
this song anymore
I said all I need to say
So now I'm just going to walk away
|
||||
9. |
The Beast
02:43
|
|||
The Beast
I use to ride The Beast
The Beast
I use to drive The Beast
The car went fast
But I drove it real slow
Because I had nowhere to be
And I had nowhere to go
The paint job was faded
It looked like raw steel
And you could do a u-turn
Just by letting go of the wheel
The Beast
I use to ride The Beast
The Beast
The muffler was unattached
There were holes in the floor
So your eyes would burn
If you drove for an hour or more
So lets pull over
And get some fresh air
Then get right back in
Because we don't fucking care
The Beast
I use to ride The Beast
The Beast
I miss The Beast
What?
You want to inspect it
Go ahead inspect it
What?
It didn't pass
It was rejected?
Rejected by who? Huh!
You?
Society?
Well you know what
All good things are rejected by society
Punk Rock
Heavy Metal
Charles fucking Bukowski
They were all rejected by society
And so am I
So I'm going to take this car and drive it from one end of the country all the way to the other
And then I'm going to drive it straight into the God damn ocean
And you know what?
I'm going to keep on fucking driving
Because nothing is going to stop this car
Not you
Not the law
Not the ocean
Not even God Damn fucking Chutulu can stop this car
Nothing can stop
The Beast
I use to ride The Beast
The Beast
I miss The Beast
|
||||
10. |
Rock and Roll Funeral
01:16
|
|||
I know I look dead
Because I am
Everyone have a ball
Rock and Roll Funeral
Puke in the hall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Piss on the wall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Kicked in the balls at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Have a good time
Don't act like a mime
Everyone have a ball
Rock and Roll Funeral
Puke in the hall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Piss on the wall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Kicked in the Balls at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Yeah!
The party's over
The party's the best
Everyone have a ball
Rock and Roll Funeral
Puke in the hall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Piss on the wall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Kicked in the balls at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
So what I'm dead
It's better
Everyone have a ball
Rock and Roll Funeral
Puke in the hall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Piss on the wall at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Kicked in the balls at my
Rock and Roll Funeral
Yeah!
|
||||
11. |
Not Reggae
02:27
|
|||
I had this girl she was so fine
So fine
Ah lord my oh my
When I walked down the street with her I was so proud
So proud
She was mine all mine
Until she said
I like reggae when it's not so reggae
And I like you when your not too you
I had this girl she was the queen bee
So beautiful
So sexy
I loved her body
her soul
And her mind
She meant everything to me
Until
She said
I like reggae when it's not so reggae
And I like you when your not too you
Sometimes I think I should just give them up
Give up all the girls
But then
Ahhh Shit
Because you think it is going to different this time
Its going to better but then
Ahhh Shit
Because sooner or later
They all say
I like reggae when it's not so reggae
And I like you when your not too you
|
||||
12. |
BRRRRR!!!!!
00:54
|
|||
It's so fucking cold
it's just so fucking cold
oh it's so fucking cold
I can't believe how cold it is
BRRRRR!!!!!
Cold
BRRRRR!!!!!
Cold
I can't feel my hands
I just can't feel my hands
oh I can't feel my hands
Do you know where my hand is
BRRRRR!!!!!
Cold
BRRRRR!!!!!
Cold
|
||||
13. |
I've Got Issues
02:54
|
|||
I drink too much
Eat everything I see
And when I'm depressed
I eat twice as much as me
Because I wasted my time
I lost my wife
I was too damn busy
Screwing up my life
I've got problems
I've got issues
Pimples on my neck
No hair on my head
The fashion police
Say I'd look better dead
Because I dress like a slob
With sandals on my feet
It gets too hot
In this god damn heat.
I've got problems
I've got Issues
Life is moving way too fast
I'm running out of time
I'm running out of chances
I'm going full speed
I heard the satellite call
And no matter what
I'm having ball
And when I'm gone
The stories they will tell
He wasn't that good
but he tried like hell
|
||||
14. |
War Death Pain and Blood
01:00
|
|||
WAR!
PAIN!
DEATH!
and BLOOD!
Motorhead
Megadeth
Sometimes they speak to me
Slayer
Accept
Later day Ministry
Sometimes I just need it
I really God Damn need it
Misfits
Mangled Dead
Those evil punks rule
Suicidal Tendencies
and let's not forget Tool
WAR!
PAIN!
DEATH!
and BLOOD!
|
||||
15. |
Evil Wins
02:23
|
|||
When we all realized we were evil
What a beautiful day it was
We raised our glasses to evil
And celebrated the end of love
Here's to evil
Here's to giving in
Here's to evil
Evil you win
|
||||
16. |
Chemical Imbalance
01:54
|
|||
Can you feel
A chemical imbalance in your head
Cuz I sure can
Does that mean there's a problem
Or is that the way it's suppose to be
Who's to say what's suppose to be
I sure as hell am not one to say
What kind of chemicals are in your head
If you haven't put them there
Asking all these questions for futile answers
|
||||
17. |
Folk Singer
02:34
|
|||
I'm breathing fire
At the ass of cooperate rock
That diseased Sphincter
Farting out bubble pop
It's the curse of the artist
To be the one that smells the rot
and we all are sinking down
Reluctant profit
can't stand the stuff they make
I wish I could stop it
For the soul of music's sake
It's the curse of the artist
To be the one that knows what's fake
And we all are sinking down
I'm your mother folking folk singer
Come to save the day
No Soul for sale
|
If you like Captain Martini and the Key Stoners, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp